a frustrating moment...a touching moment

Okay, so here is the frustrating and touching moments of last week.

John and I had been asked to be in a stake choir for church. It wasn't something either of us really wanted to do but we were asked so we did. Part of why I didn't want to do it is I'm not a strong or trained singer so I always feel like I'm constantly having to ask for my part to be played and 90% of choir directors make you feel stupid for asking when you are a soprano. So I go to support because I should but not more often than not because I'm looking forward to it. I feel music is an important part to a religious meeting and if I want that in a meeting I should support it. John wasn't thrilled just cause he's so busy.

Well it turns out things were even worse of those things than we expected. The director made me feel even more stupid than most do, and even making me feel stupid wouldn't really help by playing parts when asked. John never once heard his part alone so he could actually sing it so he only sang the unison parts. Then you add that every practice we attended was an hour and a half or so so the time issue for John was even worse. But it is what it is and she wanted things to be great so I tried to ignore how I felt when she'd say to us sopranos we were flat and to not sing that way yet not play our part so I could be confortable with what I was singing. I've tried to ignore how maybe the practice wouldn't have gone so long if she hadn't stopped three times to promote purchasing tickets to an orchestra concert that she was a part of. Circumstances were put in motion by the way they were being particular about how we walked onto the stand and a meeting prior to the main meeting that we would have to leave my kids to push their way in and get a seat that we could watch them from the stands. So I made an executive decision after talking to her and the high councilman in charge of the choir about this after one said to leave the kids at home, it was more important for a good choir, and the other said that we needed to pray and see if there is any way we could sing with the choir as it's so important. I decided that I couldn't deal with that and my husband would sit with the kids since the bass section was strong and he was mouthing half the verses anyway. But when she got so particular about what we wore to sing in stake conference it was really hard. We needed to wear black and white with as much pops in red as we could and all needed to wear red lipstick. I don't wear red lipstick...I don't have red jewelry. Men were to wear black suits and red ties, when one talked to her about not having a black suit she said grey would be okay but to try to stay away from blue as it would stand out. He said he didn't own a suit and she told him to see if he could borrow one or else it's a good thing he's in the back row. It all made me really want to wear orange or neon pink or something just to mess things up for her. But as I pondered this I realized the only thing that would hurt to do what she said if I could find a way to do it without spending money would be my pride. So I e-mailed my more stylish friends and borrowed a bunch of red jewelry, I talked to my friend who's a make up artist and enlisted her help to pain my lips red in a non hooker way.

I struggled at first to just relax and let the spirit be with me and not focus on my frustrations that led to the meeting. By the time we were sustaining a new stake presidency I was there. We sang our songs and though I think they added to the meeting it didn't necessarily change anyone's testimony and I'm good with that.

So my touching moment was at the end of the meeting. When it was all over it took me a little bit to get off the stand and down to my family as so many wanted to say something to the old or new presidency and to the two visiting general authorities. But once I finally got back to where my family had been they were moved. I found them on the last pew of the chapel. I talked to someone for a couple minutes then when I ended that conversation and looked over at my daughter Rachel she was engrossed in a conversation with the mission president his wife and the stake patriarch. They talked for quite a while. When it was done I asked her what they had talked about. She said they had noticed her dress and asked about her baptism and they had talked about what an amazing step in her life that was. She felt special and again extra happy about the decisions she was making in her life. Then my 12 year old got pulled aside to talk to someone. He just walked up and started asking my son some questions, what his mission plans were. Was he just thinking about going on a mission or was he for sure going on a mission. What made him want to go on a mission. How did he feel about the gospel and Christ. All those types of things. Then he made him promise that no matter what that Matthew would write him a letter when he got his call to tell him where he was going. It wasn't until that point that Matthew realized who he was talking to. It was Elder Arnold the visiting general authority. He was super excited to know that a general authority wanted to know where he's gong on his mission. It was such a great moment for my son.